Woooo Hooooooooooo

The name above appears on the pass list for the July 2008 California Bar Examination.

Knock Twice If The Answer Is Yes...

With mere hours left to go I have finally worked out my notification plan to family and friends. If I pass, I will send a text message saying so. If I didn't pass, don't expect to hear from me for awhile. Leave me alone and no one gets hurt. Although I have told people my plan, I have a feeling some people (I'm looking at you mom) will think this does not apply to them. Seriously people, don't call me, I'll call you (or not). The suspense is killing me and the random people asking me how I did is not helping. At least by this time tomorrow I will know my fate.

Countdown

I have been trying to avoid thoughts of the bar with little success. Now that just about everyone has heard their fate (including my friends from New York), it is impossible to ignore. Every day something or someone triggers bar thoughts that send waves of anxiety through my body. I don't know how I managed to stop thinking about the bar for a few months. Although I don't feel like I failed, I don't feel certain that I passed either. I am just hoping that all of us in California get some good news soon. I am also hoping that I never have to do all this again.

Don't Ask Me

Questions Not to Ask Me:

1. So...did you pass?
2. So how do you think you did?
3. Was the test hard?
4. I have a problem, can you give me some legal advice?

Maybe I am just being a grouch, but I am sick of the people asking me about the bar. Do not ask me shit about the bar, ever. If I want to talk about it I will. Otherwise, never bring it up. I have been doing a pretty good job about not thinking about it and people that try to re-open that wound are really starting to irritate me.

Also, just because I graduated from law school doesn't mean that I either know anything about the law, or want to help you with your particular legal problem. I am not a walking, free legal aid.

Someone actually had the nerve today, to ask me how to help a 26 year old guy that was convicted of molesting a 14 year old girl. Obviously this person had no idea that I was the absolute last person that he should have asked this question. Although I am against the death penalty, I would gladly make an exception for child molesters and rapists in a second. I was so angry my head almost exploded. The guy was lucky he was a friend of my significant other. Had he not been my sweetie's co-worker I would have ripped his head off. Instead I practically growled that a 14 girl is incapable of giving consent (despite his protest to the contrary) and walked away. What the hell is wrong with some people?

Lazy Latina

Now that I am not trying to cram random crap in my head, I barely know what to do with myself. I wish I could say I was using each day to the fullest by going to the beach, or napa, or travelling the world. Instead, I am catching up on Judge Judy and the Maury show. I am just so lazy and it takes a big effort to get me to do anything. Since I start work in a couple weeks I am trying to not feel guilty about being such a sloth. I figure as long as I am not thinking about the bar, everything is good. I hope I can keep it out of my head until the end of November. There is no point in thinking about what I got wrong or how certain essays (I'm looking at you essay #6) killed me. No, I would rather catch up on who is and isn't a baby daddy on Maury instead. There really is some quality TV on during the day. I am going to miss being a lazy Latina when I have to go back to work.

One of the 18 Million Cracks in the Glass Ceiling

Now that bar hell is over I have been pretty lazy and just enjoying my time off. Being a political junkie I have been watching the democratic national convention all day. Although it is time to move on and elect a democratic president, I am still a proud supporter of Hillary. After hearing her speech tonight I still think she was the best choice and hope I get a chance to vote for her in the future. At the very least I am hopeful she will have a strong voice in the Senate and continue to fight for important things like universal health care.

So Long Hippies!

As a die hard Cal bears fan I have been monitoring the tree squatters situation for a long time. It looks like a final decision will be made tomorrow. Today, instead of catching up on Barbri assignments that I have gotten behind on, I did some hippie watching. It was much more fun that doing the crim MBE questions that are waiting for me. As I was watching the cops try to cut zip lines and the hippies wailing, a random high school kid walked by and asked what was going on. When someone explained the struggle of the tree squatters, he asked the funniest question I ever heard: are they paying rent? Ha! I wish.

I am tempted to pack my lunch and spend the afternoon watching the police finally evict the tree squatters once and for all. The suspense of what the judge will decide tomorrow is killing me. No matter what, tomorrow is moving day.

La Mitotera, the Grouch

Aside from going through every emotion daily (hope, despair, anger, fear) I have also noticed that my feelings are so close to the surface lately. I can watch a stupid TV show and burst into tears. Or someone can take too long picking their ice cream, thus blocking my ability to grab a pint, and I get super pissed off. (Word to the wise, don't get between me and ice cream.) I go from being super confident that I will pass the bar, to fearing I might fail. I just wonder if all this is normal. I don't remember being this crazy during 1L. Then again, you can't really fail during your 1L year at Boalt. Oh how I miss the good old days. I didn't know how good I had it.

Girlfight in Barbri

The morning and the evening classes at Boalt seem markedly different. Maybe it is the type of people that go to the morning classes, the greater number of people, or maybe it the the less comfortable room, but it seems like there are more quirky and anxious people in morning Barbri. I get there every morning no later than 8:30 to find a seat. Unfortunately the class meets in Booth Auditorium and thus has a limited amount of seats with ample table space. Late comers have to squeeze into the side seats with tables approximately the size of a legal pad. Given that reality, I understand how some people get tense when they can't get a good seat.

It therefore came as no surprise that we finally had a fight over seats in class. Every morning the people like me who come early, pick a seat and sometimes drape a coat over a chair to save a seat or two for our chronically late friends. Some poor soul did the same thing and got more drama than was deserved.

Just like many of us, a girl saved a seat to her left and to her right in one of the front rows. (If she was saving a whole row, I might see things differently.) Another girl (anxious girl) came in and was upset about the saved seat because it was the seat she customarily sat in. The girl stood her ground and anxious girl took a seat in the front row. As the barbri video started anxious girl started to twitch and decided that she wanted her old seat. After all, the seat was still vacant and the video had begun. Nevermind that the person who was going to sit in the seat was just arriving or that anxious girl had a new and comparable seat, she wanted to sit in her old seat. (As an aside, this is not the first time anxious girl took a "saved" spot. The difference this time was that someone put up a fight)

After anxious girl pushed aside the stuff saving the seat she tried to sit in the seat. What ensued was actually kind of comical. Both girls tried to push each other out of the seat and at some point one of them was sitting on top of the other. Some of the people in the class freaked out that they were not able to pay attention during the cat fight and asked for the video to be stopped. The whole thing was ridiculous.

While I generally don't begrudge people the quirks that help them survive bar hell, there is something to be said for realizing when you you are getting out of hand. If someone take your favorite seat, get over it, sit in another seat. I know it sucks, but it just means you either need to come to class earlier or go to the evening class where there is absolutely no jockeying for seats. Don't force someone to give up the spot they may have saved for their friend (who could be in the bathroom or running late for some good reason) just because you didn't get to class earlier. This is especially true if there are many other good seats to chose from. I think I would have been more sympathetic to anxious girl if she didn't already secure a perfectly suitable replacement seat. I know for a fact I would have put up a fight the same way non-anxious girl did.

Somebody Stop Him, Really

Today I was subjected to Professor Chemerinsky and it was brutal. I don't care if he can recite his whole outline from memory without looking at notes. I don't care if he is one of the brightest constitutional scholars of our time. Can't they just get someone who is funny and interesting? The problem with having the funny Torts guy, is that now no one will seem good in comparison. I would settle at least for a good looking guy to read me the same notes on Constitutional Law. Actors memorize lines all the time. How about Benjamin Bratt to read me Corporations? Or better yet, I am sure George Lopez could come up with some good criminal law jokes. How about him? And just to show I am not selfish, why not have Eva Longoria read something for the guys?

Blessed

Whenever I embark on something new and scary I invariably fall back to the things that have always helped me persevere. Although many may not know this about me, I am actually pretty religious. I feel very strongly that the only reason I have gotten this far is because of God.

Although it may seem a little lame, I have depended on God to help me through even the smallest things (like learning to drive). When I first learned how to drive I was so petrified, that I would only listen to gospel music in my car. It took almost 6 months before I could give Yolanda Adams a rest and just start my journey on the freeway with a simple prayer. Now, as I face the bar I find myself doing the same thing I have always done. Aside from making a new gospel playlist for the ipod, I have also starting praying more regularly again. I hope God doesn't think of me too much as a fair weather friend since I seem to become more devoted during times of difficulty. Given his omnipotent status, I am sure he knows how thankful I am for the blessings he has given me (even if I don't go to church as much as I should).

I am comforted by the fact that God has never ever failed me in my entire life, and I know he won't now. That doesn't necessarily mean that I will pass this time around (but I think/hope I will). It just means that no matter what happens I know God will look out for me and I will be ok. I am grateful for that feeling of peace, because it is the only thing standing between me and buying some ice cream to self-medicate because of stress.

Unsolicited Advice

As someone who got an offer from my law firm last year, I feel like I can give unsolicited advice about getting an offer. Some of this is obvious, and some of it depends on the firm you are at, and its overall structure/culture. This is not an exhaustive list.

1. Communicate!
When you get your assignment, make sure you ask your reviewer tons of questions. Ask them if they recommend any sources to start with, how long they anticipate the assignment should take, and what is the drop dead deadline. If you start having trouble with your assignment communicate that right away. I have heard from many attorneys that communication is a big weakness for many summers, because they are too afraid to speak up when they need help.

2. Don't Be Shy
Reach out to people in your practice group and ask them if they would like to go to lunch or grab coffee sometime. Since the firm is bankrolling their java fix or lunch, they should be more than happy to take you (unless they are really busy). This is a great way to find out if you are a good fit for that practice group.

3. Make Sure People Know You Are Working
This might seem like odd advice, but keep your door open or cracked so attorneys walking by can see you working. Some people like to keep their doors shut while they work, but this can often look like you are not in your office. Also, if you happen to work late one night, make sure to take a quick stroll down the hall or near the office of your reviewer so they know you are a hard worker and willing to work late when necessary. (Obviously if you work at a firm that strongly discourages working late, don't do this. Also, don't do this all the time or it might seem fake. Do it just enough for them to know you are a hard worker.)

4. Go to the Major Events (and events specific to your practice group)
Although you don't have to go to all of the events, it is important to be seen and to interact with others. Everyone wants to know that you will be a pleasant person to work with. Also, make sure you go to events specific to your practice group to get a head start in making friends, and identifying people you will want to work with when you return the next year.

5. Get an Ally on the Summer Committee
If possible, get to know some of the people on the summer committee and try to develop a relationship with them. You can try do this by inviting one of them to lunch or coffee. If you are able to cultivate a relationship with someone on the committee, it is likely that you can find out if there are problems ahead of time, and that person can also vouch for you when it is time to give out the offers.

Although I can probably come up with more, those are my top five. Anyone else have any other suggestions?

Tequila!

This is how I celebrate three years of hard work. Congrats to everyone else that graduated too.

So Hood

I hung up my graduation gown to shake some of the wrinkles out today, and was admiring how much the hood looks like colorful butterfly wings or something like that. I think that it is especially fitting since my favorite book as a child was the hungry caterpillar and I always thought it would be cool to be a butterfly. I have to admit that even after reading the 5 part instructions on how to attach the hood, I have no idea how the fancy hood thing works. Still, it looks pretty cool and way better than my high school and college graduation gown.

Charge It!

Although I am not yet done with finals, I have been out shopping. Given that it should be fairly warm in the East Bay this summer and air conditioning is scarce, I thought I should get a whole new cool and comfortable wardrobe. Every time I pick through a clothes rack and pick another thing to buy I think, "you should buy this, it will help you pass the bar". While I hardly need an excuse to shop, I love using this rationale in my head. Yes, you "need" those shorts. How can you concentrate in Barbri if you don't have a cute pair of shorts that keep you cool and match the new top you bought? It makes sense to me. I blame the blog, a girl walks into a bar exam for giving me the idea.

Best Things About Berkeley?

Now that I am in full procrastination mode, I was trying to think up all of the things I will miss about Berkeley once I leave. So far I have only come up with Yogurt Park. Maybe if I procrastinate some more I can think of some other things I will miss. Don't you just love finals and the way they can prompt you to do anything but what you are supposed to be doing? Is there anything you would add to a list of good things about Berkeley?

The Full "Berkeley" Experience

After warning my family about the Yoo protesters, I have changed my mind about not wanting them to protest. It turns out that every family member I have told is getting a big kick out of the idea that there will be protesters. They feel like they are going to get the full Berkeley experience. Out of everyone, my grandmother was the most enthusiastic about getting to see the orange people. So, protest away orange people, I support you!

Buyers Remorse

Within hours of making my final payment for the PMBR course, I am starting to regret it. Almost everyone I have talked to recently has said it was a waste of time because you simply do a bunch of MBE questions even though you don't know the law yet. How much can you honestly learn about your weaknesses if everything is a weakness? It sure seems like I am spending a lot of money to take tests that are easily available in the PMBR books for a much lower price. Still, I can't bring myself to cancel the payment. I am definitely suffering from pack mentality and will do just about anything to pass.

This Happens To Good People?

When I graduated from college I didn't expect to be one of the first of my friends to get married, and I wasn't. That distinction fell to my friend Michelle who had dated another member of our group of friends. As I went on one dating disaster after another, she had a life that I envied. Her husband was sweet, smart, and dependable, and she had two adorable boys. Together they would go on camping trips and I would live vicariously through the pictures she posted on her blog of them happily hiking through the woods. I thought she had everything I wanted, until now.

I just found out that her husband had an affair with a woman that eerily looks much like Michelle. In addition to telling my friend that he no longer loves her, he also left her for the other woman. I feel terrible for my friend and really can't comprehend how something like this happens. Those two have been together for so long and they have children together. How can someone just walk away like that? It really has shaken my world. To add insult to injury, her soon to be ex-husband brings his sons around the other woman and she says things like, "your mom is ugly". How can a man that promised to love, honor, and cherish her in front of all his friends and family do something like this? How can anyone ever be sure that something this awful won't happen to them as well? My world is rocked.

So Close Yet So Far

I am still trying to finish up papers and finals. It doesn't help that I have writers block and no real motivation to keep working. It is so sad that I have taken a topic that I once loved and transformed it into something I can't stand. I wish I could just be done without all the work. This is what I get for being such a slacker all semester.

Writing Requirement Hell

Although I have made a significant dent in my writing requirement, I am probably about 10-15 pages away from completion. I never thought it would happen but I am completely out of BS. I know that is not supposed to happen to a future attorney, but it has. I am completely and utterly unmotivated to finish even though my advisor is probably going to kill me. I worry that this is a bad pattern for me. I often have to have my feet to the fire to get things done. Why can't I just be a normal person and be motivated to finish without a scary deadline?

Selfish?

Am I am selfish for not wanting to share my day with the orange jumpsuit people? The more I think about the protest, the more it irritates me. Although everyone faces unique struggles to graduate from law school, my journey was particularly difficult.

While just getting into Boalt was a great achievement for me, graduating three years later is probably one of the biggest things I will ever accomplish in my life. The pride of graduating from Boalt doesn't just belong to me, it belongs to my entire family.

Although I have no problem with a few people with some signs, it is starting to sound like the protest is morphing into more than that. Instead of my family peacefully making their way to the Greek Amphitheatre early Saturday morning, they will have to contend with people shouting at them and pushing offensive pictures in their face. The walkways to the amphitheater are narrow and it is likely the protesters will obstruct their ability to get to the graduation. It will probably be a nightmare to get my disabled family friend to the amphitheater.

Lastly, since the day of graduation is probably the last time I will see all of my 3L friends in one place, I was looking forward to drinking cheap champagne in the courtyard and introducing my family to the people who helped me survive law school. Maybe it’s selfish, but I don’t want to share my graduation with the protesters. Nothing they do is going to change what is happening. If I knew their protest would actually stop torture, I would feel differently. Instead, their actions will only have a direct impact on me and my family’s ability to enjoy the one day I have been given to celebrate the end to a very long journey. I don’t think it is fair they are using my graduation as a soap box. But then again, I should know better. I know life is often not fair.

So Annoyed I Could Torture Somebody

So it appears that Boalt is adding a new group of folks that want to protest commencement this year. Apparently some people think dressing up in orange jump suits and protesting Boalt's graduation is a fun way to spend a Saturday morning. Although the idea of sharing my hard earned day with Berkeley crazies is annoying, it is not as annoying as the comments on Nuts & Boalts. Some of those people take themselves way to seriously. If you want to spend your Saturday yelling at my grandma, fine. She is pretty tough and is more likely to laugh and shrug it off than get upset. I just wish they would stop being so sanctimonious. Wearing an orange jump suit and jeering at graduating 3Ls isn’t going to get Yoo fired, stop torture, change the world, or even change anyone’s mind. But hey, I think protesting is fun too, so I get it. Just don’t get in the way of me drinking my cheap celebratory champagne and nobody will get hurt.

Yikes

And so it begins....

27 Days

It is starting to sink in that I have less than a month standing between me and studying for the bar. Despite having lots of friends that failed I am staying optimistic. Although I didn't get the highest score on the LSAT, I also didn't get the lowest score either. I know I have enough brainpower to pass. I don't have to have the highest score on the bar, I just want to pass.

I am also trying to get prepared. I have begun cleaning my house from head to toe so I can study comfortably. I am also trying to be more disciplined. Being a 3L has not inspired me to be very disciplined, but I certainly have relaxed during this last year.

I found an interesting blog that teaches you how to become more self-disciplined. I think I am going to do the 30 day challenge and turn myself into an early riser. It might be a little painful, but necessary. I have to be ready to ramp up a mere day after graduation since I will be doing PMBR.

Morally Challenged

Unlike many of my other friends I am just getting around to finishing my moral character application for the bar. As I feared it has been very difficult to remember all the jobs I have held and where I have lived over the past years. I am curious to know how closely they scrutinize the application. Last year at least one of my friends had their application sent back because it did not have enough detailed employment information. I hope that will not happen to me.