I am just baffled at the sheer numbers of young girls and women walking the earth with low self-esteem. During conversations with friends I hear the endless stories of smart accomplished women put up with ridiculous amounts of crap, all in the name of not being alone. Why do so many people need to have outer validation to know that they are amazing? I am not saying that I have never hit rock bottom in the name of love, but there has got to be a limit.
I finally hit my limit of what I can understand, when I recently discovered a good friend of mine is anorexic. This person is super smart, cute, sweet, etc; yet where I see an attractive woman, she sees a fat, disgusting, hideous blob. She confessed to me that she has not eaten in 5 days and I am at a lost for words (which incidentally doesn't happen often). When I talked to her about the motivations behind her actions it became clear that she cares more about what a passing stranger thinks about her body than about her health. How could any guy love her if she is not a size 0 right? I just wish I could understand how someone gets there. How can you literally starve your self to death just because you are afraid that men won't find you attractive if you don't? I love men as much as the next straight woman, but hell would freeze over before I gave up eating for them. I don’t believe in living in hell before I die.
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This is a complicated issue, actually - I don't know how much low self-esteem has to do with it, or if it's a factor of grossly distorted perceptions of reality.
The brain is a funny thing. And when that funny thing doesn't have enough serotonin, anything goes. Some people stay in bed and don't leave the house, others wash their hands 300 times a day, and yet others don't eat for 5 days. But anorexia isn't about self-esteem any more than depression. I just hope your friend gets the help she needs.
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