Low Self-Esteem

I am just baffled at the sheer numbers of young girls and women walking the earth with low self-esteem. During conversations with friends I hear the endless stories of smart accomplished women put up with ridiculous amounts of crap, all in the name of not being alone. Why do so many people need to have outer validation to know that they are amazing? I am not saying that I have never hit rock bottom in the name of love, but there has got to be a limit.

I finally hit my limit of what I can understand, when I recently discovered a good friend of mine is anorexic. This person is super smart, cute, sweet, etc; yet where I see an attractive woman, she sees a fat, disgusting, hideous blob. She confessed to me that she has not eaten in 5 days and I am at a lost for words (which incidentally doesn't happen often). When I talked to her about the motivations behind her actions it became clear that she cares more about what a passing stranger thinks about her body than about her health. How could any guy love her if she is not a size 0 right? I just wish I could understand how someone gets there. How can you literally starve your self to death just because you are afraid that men won't find you attractive if you don't? I love men as much as the next straight woman, but hell would freeze over before I gave up eating for them. I don’t believe in living in hell before I die.

Misty Water Color Memories

I guess the beginning of a new year can breed nostalgia for some. How else can I explain why my old boyfriend from over four years ago decided to call out of the blue and see how I was doing? Mind you, this man is the same person who literally crushed my heart and brought me to my knees. I would have walked to the ends of the earth for this guy and almost gave up everything. He is the guy that taught me how foolish it is to travel half way around the world for a man and put all my career aspirations on hold. So I was shocked that he had the nerve to contact me after all this time. Part of me wishes I were married and living a life to be envious of. Granted being a law student at Boalt isn’t too shabby but I always fantasized that he would come back one day and I would be super thin, gorgeous, and married to a wildly successful husband. Even though I was tempted, I didn’t even respond. What could I really say?

Spare the Rod Spoil The Child?

CA State Assemblywoman Sally Lieber is trying to pass a law that would outlaw spanking a child under three years old. Now I'm all for protecting children, but I think this is going too far. Now I wasn’t a bad kid per se, but I had my share of spankings. While I obviously didn’t enjoy the sting of the chancla (sandal in English) across my butt at the time, I can see now how those spankings gave me boundaries and kept me in line. It amazes me how so many parents nowadays try to reason and rationalize with their children when they throw a nasty fit in public. I know if my mom were handling it, that tantrum would be over in seconds. Its not like I had to be spanked all the time. I think one or two good spankings usually do the trick. Call me a child abuser, but I am pretty sure when/if I have children I will spank them if they get out of line. Ms. Lieber better stay out of my way or she can take care of my bad ass kids.

Good To Be Back

Although I would like to post more, I spent the first week of school hunting for interesting classes that fit my desire to have a four-day weekend. I surfed so many classes and scrawled my name on so many wait lists I was beginning to wonder if I would ever get my schedule straight. I was sweating it out on the wait list for about 80% of all my classes, but I just checked my status today and it looks like I am officially in all the classes I wanted. Unfortunately, many of my fellow students were not as lucky. I don't know what happened this semester, but it seemed like almost everyone I knew was on the wait list for the classes they wanted. I know a few poor souls who got stuck taking really boring classes or trying to score an externship for credits at the last minute. Hopefully prospects will be better fall of next year. Then again, as a 3L I am not so sure I will be a good student and a good class might be wasted on me. In any event, it is good to be back.

Happy New Year

I love new years day because it feels like everything is possible and you get to begin the new year with a fresh start.

This year I will work out at the gym at least five times a week, only eat healthy food, read all the reading assigned for each class before every class, start outlining more than a week before finals, go to office hours and ask well thought out questions that demonstrate my sophisticated understanding of the material, balance extracurricular activities with school well, spend more time with my family, and last but not least—have some fun.

YEAH RIGHT. Happy New Year anyway! Hope springs eternal that 2007 will be much better than 06.